Telegraph guarantees to boost your Britishness by up to 28%!!!

Boost Britishness? What the hell does that mean! Looks like the bleedin 'we don't quite know what it means but hopefullly if we call ourselves British then everything will be much better' brigade are at it again (apparently its something to do with fish and chips). The telegraph has a new campaign for 'boosting Britishness' and has even managed to get David Cameron's support:


Cameron says he calls himself "very much British" when he is abroad, and like so many Britons his family has roots in various corners of the United Kingdom.
"My father's side of the family by being Camerons are predominantly Scottish. On my mother's side of the family, her mother was a Llewellyn, so Welsh. I'm a real mixture of Scottish Welsh and English. Her grandmother's side were Scottish Empire builders - conquered all sorts of parts of India, I think."

Yup, that's uhh, nice I suppose, don't see what that's got to do with being British though. Does that mean your less British if you don't introduce yourself to foreigners with the words 'I'm very much British you know!' like some obnoxious tw@t. I don't quite know what it is but every time I hear about one of these little campaigns, or a mainstream politician talking about what it is to be 'British' (it's fish and chips innit!) I only end up feeling less British myself like my entire cultural identity is just being used as some terrible gimmick by politicians so that they can hang on to Scotland and win votes with the sort of people who tattoo Union Jacks to their forheads as if to say they need to remind people constantly of what complete and utter vankers they are. I used to get a vague sense of patriotism when I listened to the national Anthem, now I just feel rather depressed. I used to know what being British was and why I was British, Britain was my home and in a strange sort of way I belonged to it and in an even stranger way, it belonged to me.
That isn't good enough nowadays, unless people have something solid or material like Churchill, the Queen, Wayne Rooney and, dare I say it, fish and chips they apparently aren't British. Its this sort of patronising view that Britishness can be described and sold to us that upsets me so much and has made me give up my old patriotic past. I don't like it, its not bringing Britain together as much as its driving us apart because every single one of these patronising views of what Britishness is is different to every other one and as such the attempt to force all these different ideas on us is doomed to fail. It's also going to help the nationalist parties destroy the union. The modern union of Scotland, England and Wales is not founded upon a common belief in Britishness at any cost, its about finding common aims and getting along together, nothing particularly special, just the idea that were not really all that different and that were probably better off together. This gimmicky Britishness thing however has taken the idea of union to a world of its own as exemplified so well by 'I'm very much British' Cameron :

But has devolution for Wales, and particularly Scotland, not simply created unfairness for English taxpayers? Voters south of the border want redress at some point, polls suggest.
Cameron accepts that, but says he will apply what amounts to a Union test which any reforms which effect the relationship will have to pass. "Point one, an imperfect Union is better than anything that threatens it. The Union always comes first. Point two, I always say to my party yes of course there are things that can upset you - like different spending levels, but remember, the Union comes first and don't blame the Union, blame the government. Third, I want to be Prime Minister of the United Kingdom not England."

Alex Salmond must be having a field day with this sort of tripe and to be honest I can't really blame him. If I was living in Scotland this would make me want to get as far away from David Cameron as possible too. At least Gordon Brown isn't doing some stupid Britishness crusade, oh hang on, ahh well.

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Re: Telegraph to boost Britishness by up to 28%! (#1)

The Telegraph Headline "Conrad Black to get 6 to 10 years" (News tonight) Won't make me feel more  British..But it will make me feel  28% happyer

Re: Telegraph to boost Britishness by up to 28%! (#2)

Sorry, Cameron things that 'conquering' all parts of India is something to be proud of???

How completely outrageous and unacceptable!!!!!!

Re: Politicians trying to be british/ and cool (#3)

Oh god. Politicians always think they're being british if they have a 'cup of tea' or 'fish and chips'. On the other hand, we can be enforcing ethnic bloc tendencies, by perhaps talking about Eid and Diwali, but not the incredibly offensive Christmas, when politicians talk about these festivals as 'British'. It's like when politicians try and talk to kids and think the are 'hip' because they use words like 'cool' and 'wicked', taking the example of Virgin records being renamed 'Zavvi', bgecause it's a word young people use alot. When pointed out that this is infact not true, they said it rhymes with 'Savvy' which is a word kids use alot. I have never heard someone my age use the word savvy. Politicians try and think we are perhaps all visceral patriots, but I don't think that's true.